Dear Love Guru

Dear Love Guru

Dear Love Guru,

I am in love. As many times as I have said that in my life (and there have been plenty), it has never felt as true and as right as it does in this relationship. We rarely argue, we help each other through ups and downs, we have amazing communication, we are best friends and we are great lovers. But. Of course there is a but. He doesn’t practice yoga. He is supportive of my practice, and he will even take a class with me now and then, but yoga is not a part of his life the way it is mine. He is not on the yogic path, and I don’t want to force him onto it. Do you think that I can spend forever with a man who is not a yogi?

In need of your guidance,

Yogini in Love in Bend


Dear Flexible Lover,

Because I am trained in the ways of love and not in the ways of telling the future, my answer may not satisfy you. Though with a lover as you described above I suspect you do not need my help feeling satisfied. Is it getting warm in here? Er, let’s get back to your question.

There are so many things that contribute to a relationship being successful, all of which you seem to have in the bag. The tricky part is, you can do everything “right” and still not stand the test of time. People, books, and Dr. Phil will tell you there is a foolproof formula to make love last but the truth is there is no such foolproof formula. Each love affair is as unique as an individual snowflake and therefore it is impossible to predict it’s outcome, no matter how many stars line up to support it’s success. And what makes a “successful” relationship anyway? I know many relationships that have lasted a lifetime and have been far from perfect (or even tolerable).

To address your life path compatibility concerns, I have a few questions for you that may help sort things out. First, does this partner have some sort of discipline practice in his life? Second, are your CORE VALUES in alignment? Third, and this may be most crucial, do you love him enough to see him in Lululemon man tights should he one day fall in love with the practice of yoga to the degree that you have?

I suspect you know what to do next, dear yogini. And for that, you won’t need my help.

-The Love Guru


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