Dear Love Guru: All Locked Up
Dear Love Guru,
I have been single for a while…quite a while, actually. Which is not a problem, I love my life just the way it is and regardless of my singledom, my heart is wide open. Ultimately, I would love to be in love and I would be honored to start a family. But I am in no rush and refuse to “settle.” I get asked out a fair amount. In fact, there is currently a man in my life asking me out nearly every day. The problem? I don’t want to give him a chance.
I recognize that he is nice enough and I’m sure possesses an abundance of good qualities. We share many mutual friends and he appears to have great hobbies. But I just don’t want to go out of my way to spend time with him and I find myself saying things like, “I don’t have time to make a new friend.” Am I being too hasty? Have I been single all this time because I don’t give anyone a chance? Or is it ok that I know in my heart he is probably not the man for me and therefore spend only very limited amounts of energy getting to know him? Please advise. I know I won’t be an Old Maid. But should I force myself to branch out romantically?
Your thoughts, please.
Yogini on Lockdown
Dear All Locked Up and Nowhere to Go,
Read your question out loud to yourself and I bet you the answer you seek shall be yours. You love your life as it is. You do not want to settle. You believe in true love. You know how to listen to your heart. The word “force” has no place in matters of love, my little porcupine.
I suggest you continue reading the auto-biography of Susan B. Anthony, just make sure you do it in a coffee shop. If you are to find your one true love, you must place yourself (and your open heart) in his path. And remember, some of the sweetest and most precious moments in a love story happen before that love is actualized. For now, court yourself. And save friendship with men for the workplace, not the bedroom.